The Dating Game 

The problem I have with dating apps is… trifold? If that word is even allowed to be used in this instance. 

  1. I feel like I am forcing fate. 
  2. I don’t understand why guys swipe right on me. 
  3. I don’t feel like I am good enough. 

Now now, I know what you’re thinking. Gosh, she’s really hard on herself. But here’s the truth. I’ve never been the smallest girl in the room. Granted, I haven’t been the biggest either. But, I feel like that’s a huge factor for some guys. I’ve always been athletic, so I guess I have that going for me. But, until recently I haven’t actually stuck to maintaining a healthy lifestyle. This time I’m actually serious about losing the weight because I know I can do it and I want to see how good I can look. But, I digress this isn’t a fat post. Well, not entirely. 

Back to number one. Forcing fate and all that. I am a believer of “meet cutes” you know where you meet someone in like a coffee shop or restaurant or store and it’s like a great story to tell the kids in the future. You can’t have a “meet cute” online. What will I tell my kids, “Yeah sweetie, I swiped right on your father. And we’ve been together ever since.” How romantic? On that same note however, I don’t know why I’m thinking of forever with people I haven’t even met. But every time I am about to swipe right, I have to ask myself, “do I see myself with this person in the future?” (keep in mind that I have no way of knowing if they’ve swiped on me first before I swipe them.) Maybe I am taking it too seriously.

Numero dos. I am pretty hard on myself. But after hearing what my own friends do on the app (they just swipe tight on every girl, because it’s a numbers game and the girls have to initiate the conversation first so if they end up not liking her they don’t respond.) I wonder if the people who swiped right for me, I wonder if they’re genuine. To be honest,  I know there is a reason for everyone to pick anyone, I want to know what my catch is. How do I lure people in? 

And finally, because I’m falling asleep. (Correction, fell asleep, woke up and now I’m finishing this.) I know that the thought of me not being good enough is just another way I continue to bring myself down, but it’s still there. I see all these guys doing great things and then there’s me. After they meet me, will they think I’m still as amazing as they once imagined or will they be disappointed? 

But hey,  none of this even matters if they don’t respond, right? 

Alexandria 

 

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