On Friday night. I was home. Alone. I watched Sharp objects.
I drank Deep Eddy’s Lemon vodka.
I broke a glass.
& then I used it to cut myself.
I had no reason to do it. It was honestly just the perfect storm, because I’ve been really wanting to break a glass and see what it would feel like to do so and to potentially use it. But, I didn’t feel anything. I saw the blood, but I didn’t feel the pain. It just felt like it was something to do.
It was also the first time I cut anywhere other than my wrist. But, I wanted the lines to be longer, so I cut the length of my thigh.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me. And I’m afraid to tell me friend that I failed, because I don’t want to let them down.