It’s been a while since I have written. And I hate for you guys to think that I only write when my life is falling apart, but that seems to always be the case. Mainly, since it’s the only thing that keeps me together.
However, this time it’s not falling apart. It’s been better than ever.
These past few months, I have actually been really happy. I have been working consistently, I have been eating healthier, working out, and speaking more of my truth to my friends ( i.e. letting them in more on my day to day life). Needless to say, I have been living my life like it’s golden.
In fact, this past week I actually went back to California to visit the family that I used to work for ( they moved out there last August) and I spent a week with them and I really enjoyed myself and hanging out with the kids.
For whatever reason, I thought that maybe I would have a trigger of some sorts, but to my surprise, I didn’t think of him once. Not once. Not even one time. Looking back at it, I am completely happy that he isn’t even on my radar anymore. However, a part of me is saddened that that part of my life is over now. Because I feel that if I don’t remember it was it really significant enough to do all the damage that it did. I know the logical answer is yes, but still. It’s something I think about.
Granted, I am no longer the person who needs to obsess over it, or talk it out, or avoid talking it out, or cry over it, or get upset that I am not crying over it, or simply even think about it at all. In fact, I haven’t thought about it. Like I said, AT ALL. And yes, I am ecstatic, I am elated, I am joyful, and thankful, and blessed that I no longer have to deal with that part of my life anymore. I am still concerned that I am concerned that it’s over.
But, hey. No more dwelling. Here is the truth:
I have been traveling constantly the last 6 months for work and this past week started my two month travel adventure. I get to go to camp three times, I am meeting up with my friends, I am going to travel somewhere with my sister (don’t know where yet), hopefully I am going to Bermuda. But, moral of the story is, I will be busy making happy memories with the people I love, surrounded by people who love me, and I couldn’t be happier.
I feel great and I am not ashamed about that anymore.
Goodbye & Goodnight